Thursday, October 20, 2011

Jonah Adam

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"He took their little children, one by one, and blessed them, and prayed unto the Father for them. And when he had done this he wept again; And he spake unto the multitude, and said unto them: Behold your little ones." 3 Nephi 17
I've been mentally composing this post in my head for a while now and trying to figure out what to say, so here goes. First, a story—I promise it's related.
The summer after my freshman year of college, I moved back to Monrovia to live with my parents and work for a couple of months. I was asked to be the Primary pianist at church, and my first Sunday playing was our family friend Adam's first Sunday coming to Primary. Adam was born with cerebral palsy, leaving him blind and mute amidst his many other physical challenges. The Primary chorister announced that the children had been preparing a special song to sing for Adam to welcome him to church, and that song would be "I'll Walk With You" (lyrics found here). I couldn't help but cry while I was playing the piano to hear the sweet voices of the kids singing these words—
            "Jesus walked away from none
             He gave His love to everyone
             So I will! I will!"

—and then I looked up to see one of the little girls I babysat put her arm around Adam and give him a little hug while he was sitting in his dad's arms. I think of this experience often, and of Adam's sweet, perfect spirit inside his imperfect physical body, and feel so warm and good inside.

On October 8th, my sweet baby nephew Jonah Adam Terrill was born with Trisomy 13. Our family has been anxiously waiting for months for his arrival, not knowing how long he would be with us because of his condition and the number of physical challenges that would be facing him upon his arrival on earth. I thought that I'd be planning a trip home for a funeral, but after talking to my family, I decided last minute that I should try to be there to see him, hold him, kiss his very Terrill nose, tell him I loved him. I was so, so lucky to be able to plan a trip home last weekend, when I got to hold the little guy, spend some quality time with all five of my siblings, and help my brother Harry and his family while they took care of baby Jonah. We celebrated the end of each day with another candle on Jonah's birthDAY cake. We all believed that Jonah was trying his best to hang on so he could meet the siblings that were coming from so far away to meet him, and he miraculously made it. It was a quick trip—I got home Tuesday night—and it all feels like a blur now.
Last night, I got a call from my sister Phoebe—while I was writing this post—saying that Jonah's mortal body finally gave in to the challenges it was faced with, and that he had gone home to live with his Heavenly Father. I have never felt so simultaneously happy and sad—happy knowing that Jonah's spirit and spirit body are perfect and that he no longer has to live on earth in discomfort, but so profoundly sad seeing my brother and sister in-law and their family suffer in this way. 
I do not often wax religious on my blog, but I think it's important here to note that despite our family's sadness, I ultimately take comfort in the gospel of Jesus Christ and in the knowledge that our families will be together forever. I take comfort in thinking of my sweet future children who will know Jonah before I get to meet them. I take comfort in the power of prayers. I take comfort in Jonah's brother Porter's words, who said that despite our sadness, "we can be happy because we will see Jonah again when we die." I take comfort in knowing that Jonah's physical challenges and my brother and sister in-law's grief and suffering has been felt by Christ and redeemed through the Atonement.
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And I take comfort in knowing that Jonah and Adam—two sweet boys that I only briefly met—have touched the lives of so many people, near and far. I want to be a better person, cherish my relationships, and be as close to Christ as they were. 
And I will! I will!
 
-Hannah

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